“sorry for the awful emails, you didnt deserve that. You ignited something so deep in me that it brought all this ugly stuff too and for some reason i was deeply hurt you closed so much. But we are both human and doing our best. And now the world is in crisis. We dont know what will happen. I hope you dont remember me only for my weaknesses and the bad moments. I was weak and lost in the darkness. I still like you and care for you and would still drive across the country to help you move although i still dont know why and all this feels bigger than us or our understanding. Markasshole (sometimes)”
I told her i felt manipulated and used. And that people like her are superficial and not genuine and that i regret ever seeing her or messaging her and all this and that i hope corona kills all the idiots and i just want to eat your perfect pussy and thought if i drive there we will fuck everywhere and stop somewhere and the windows will get misty and you will write something sweet on them and we will laugh and cry and love and how despite all this i see so much of myself in her and that one day she is gonna come back to that girl again who was crazy about me because now some demon has stolen her from me and you will remember what i said and know that beyond all this we love each other and have loved before time began and knowing each other doesn’t matter because we recognized something eternal and i hope i never run into you and my darkness has overtaken me once again and i just destroy everything and this is what i warned you yet you wanted and demanded more and to see the real me so i showed you and you felt unsafe but how did you think i felt when you closed and i was nothing in your world i love you forever and ever