poet

i have nothing to teach anyone
i dont really believe in anything
all i can do is express this
whatever is going on
right now i feel this terrible
agony somewhere in my body
but the place is unclear
just this vague sea of nothingness
feels like it is trying to swallow me
and i wonder if i am finally losing it
think about taking all my clothes off
and just walking into the forest
and keep going let the bugs
and animals eat me alive
who gives a fuck
so yeah i have thoughts like this
and i sometimes play musical instruments
to accompany my own thoughts
some call it poetry or art or whatever
it doesn’t matter what you call it
i don’t want a family or money
i have desire for anything but to just
sleep and survive and wake up again
feeling like the nothingness
is on fire and all other attempts
at meaning or clinging onto things
thinking you are someone or something
is a dead end and eventually
everything will fade into oblivion
fucknhell i even managed to depress myself
and i thought i was already miserable
now its even worse so as you can see
even so called poetry doesnt even work
this is all a scam and i am the ultimate
con artist because like the greatest actors
i make you think i am actually like this
endless loops of chaos flying around
in my head and out the door
wow what a fucking trip
now i know what its like to
truly be insane