1999

i would rather continue
being broke and miserable
than compromise my bullshit values
looking for a new show to binge on
or maybe find a girl
to binge on her
and be her binge
willingly
anything to take me away from the seesaw
wantit and then hateit
sit in a mansion full of gold
wearing nice clothes
sleeping on a bed made from magical feathers
seeing in mirrors someone
i used to be
binge on you
party like it’s 1999
i miss those times
big clunky computers
vcr and vhs
i’m a 90s kids at heart
all my favorite movies and music
like michael’s mann’s heat
and nirvana unplugged
i remember when we rented videos
and played goldeneye on that ol’ 64
summers spent in finland
none of this bipolar mood swing madness
didn’t have to worry about nothing
now i am obsessed with poetry
and spirituality and songwriting
life is so complex
i keep on buying books i never read
i’m a gambler and a junkie
you are my casino
you are my drug
i want to win and lose and drink too much
i want to plunge you into my vein
i want to watch every episode of you
and every season all night
and troll youtube interviews of you
trollin’ like it’s 1999
and show up to work the next day
shaking and insane with worn out eyes
binge on you like it’s 1999