The following was written for myself. I wrote it BEFORE I did it and while doing some of it. All of this took place today. No, you don’t have to become “me” to do it as well. Anyone can do it. The keys are in your hands. You are the pilot. Go on, read away…but first wipe that smirk off your face. Oh and you can do some stuff in a little different order if you prefer, don’t worry the raw police won’t get you. For that.
PHASE 1
* get up off your ass
* take off all your clothes and throw them in the washing machine
* go in the bathroom, clean your mouth, pee
* open window(s) to get rid of bad air in your home
* take 10 deep breaths
* tell yourself “today’s the day that I make a change and start living optimally. Not tomorrow, not at the start of the week/month/year but TODAY! RIGHT NOW!!!!”
* go in the kitchen and drink 1 litre of water (it has to be precisely 1.000 litres, no more, no less!)
* take a hot shower and thoroughly cleanse yourself, play with yourself in the shower if you must
PHASE 2
* while drying go into your kitchen and get ready to make some changes (don’t get dressed yet! if it’s cold, deal with it!)
– clean all dishes, utensil & appliances that might be leftover from yesterday…
– gather all “cooking” stuff into a bag or box (oh you got that for christmas? awww…to bad. Maybe next year Santa will bring you something “nice”.)
– gather all food on your counter (frozen and unfrozen)
– throw out all opened unhealthy food (if you don’t know what that means, you’re probably not ready for this! if you still have doubts about the science, about your protein, or evolution, I suggest you go study some nutrition and then come back.)
– gather all unopened (processed) food jars, boxes, containers into bag or box (for optional donation if it makes your heart pound easier)
– drink another 1 litres of water (this time do it with a little more wild beastiness so it drips all over you. grawl like a lion!)
PHASE 3
* do some jumping jacks
* dance naked for a few seconds and go nuts, laugh it off… life is not so bad!
* calm down
* get dressed
* take silly photos of yourself
* NO THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO EAT, you don’t deserve food yet! haha. drink some more water if you’re hungry.
* look good, smile, be alive, FEEL great. this is empowering…
* take out the garbage (with all that “trash” food that you told yourself won’t hurt you), get it out of your home! the garbage still inside you we’ll deal with later…
* go online and see where you can donate food and your other “disease machines” e.g. toasters, microwaves, frying pans, etc (tips: Salvation Army, homeless shelters, Hostels)
(Personally, I threw all my trash food away justifying by the fact that if I want to give food to the poor, that food should be no less healthier than the food for the rich –> being us who can afford it. But the plastic, metal stuff you should at least recycle. Besides, Finland is a socialist state. Everybody has food, shelter and other basic necessities met. If they don’t, they are either here illegally or they are suffering of something called stupidity. These are problems for a different post. Stop lecturing me. A few spice containers and frozen ginger is not going to solve the world’s hunger problems. If you have lots of food to get rid of and it has a long shelf life, send it to Africa, give it to your grandma, do what your morality tells you. Ultimately, the “waste” argument is pathetic considering what we have been doing and I doubt that there are many people who can truly stand by their unwastefullness.)
* get that ass moving and take the food and gear to whatever place you are taking it to and give it to them. Yes, FOR FREE!!
PHASE 4
* have a nice long walk home. Look around. See the beauty in the little things. Smile with your eyes at strangers walking by. Think about your life and how you have come so far. Think about how free you feel, how light, how unburdened. It’s already working!
* go to a grocery store
* buy “whole, fresh, ripe, raw fruits & veggies” (memorize those 6 words if you have trouble remembering what you were supposed to buy)
* come home
* fill your kitchen with these bright, beautiful living organisms which will from now on be your fuel for life (they want you as much as you want them)
* prepare some fruit and cut them up nice and calm
* make your meal look like a work of art
* sit down, turn some music on or listen to the hum of life soothe your ears
* eat
* taste
* enjoy
* feel the nourishment
* feel your body smile for finally showing it some respect and love
PHASE 5
* health
* happiness
* —- fill in the blank —-
* —- fill in the blank —-
* —- fill in the blank —-
* —- fill in the blank —-
*** spreading the love ***
I wrote this today after waking up and feeling less than I knew I could be feeling. I had eaten some nachos and french fries yesterday which made me feel like shit. I started doing phase 1 without even thinking about it. I KNEW I had to do this. This was it. No more experiments. No more “diets”. No more “i’ll eat the remainder of my unhealthy food and THEN i’ll start…”. No more fucking around with my health. Remember, what we eat is not everything. But it is the best place to start in getting everything we deserve and CAN have.
I also decided that I wouldn’t post this until I had done it. Well here I am. And here it is. I feel good. Strong. My life is just beginning. My best days are ahead of me. They can be for you as well. No I haven’t been 100% raw for 10 years or 5 million milleniums but today is the day I will look back upon and call the turning point of my life.
Ladies & Gentlemen,
Love yourselves
…and then MAYBE we can love each other
😀
Markus
PS. This works. I’m the proof. You see? Now, I’m 100% low fat raw vegan. Or a better and simpler adjective: healthian. That’s what I am. SImple as that.